I wrote a book for you!
Your body is your life partner, not your life’s project.
The anti-aging and diet/wellness industries have scammed all of us into believing that younger and thinner is always better, and there is a narrowly defined way to eat and exercise to age "well." Their fear-mongering tells you to work harder, restrict more, and you'll finally be content with your body.
But this is not the case.
Unapologetic Aging untangles the complexities of anti-aging and diet and wellness culture, teaching you how to navigate their harmful messaging and age with more ease and confidence. You can nourish yourself for vitality and worry less about your body's size and shape. You can move your body in ways that feel good and will continue to feel good as you get older.
Midlife and beyond, with all its changes and milestones, is an opportunity to emerge as your most authentic self. It's time to break free from limiting beliefs and stories you’ve inherited about your body.
Pre-Order Links
Early Praise for Unapologetic Aging
“How’s wellness culture workin' out for you? Debra Benfield’s UNAPOLOGETIC AGING offers a much-needed antidote to the toxic mix of fatphobia, ageism, and diet culture that swirls around us all. A registered dietitian and nutritionist, Benfield brings decades of experience to this radical, compassionate approach to nourishing and caring for your body on your terms—no matter how thin, young, or virtuous you aren’t. Drawing on eye-opening insights, thoughtful storytelling, and accessible practices, UNAPOLOGETIC AGING will equip you to reject harmful “norms” and embrace your evolving self.”
Ashton Applewhite, author of THIS CHAIR ROCKS: A MANIFESTO AGAINST AGEISM
"Unapologetically Aging" is a brilliant resource as we consider our relationship with food, our bodies, our unique histories, and our desired futures. I loved the stories, the practical prompts, and the compassionate and wise guidance. Incredible!"
Jennifer L. Gaudiani, MD, CEDS-C, FAED, Founder & Medical Director of the Gaudiani Clinic, author of "Sick Enough: A Guide to the Medical Complications of Eating Disorders and Malnutrition" (Routledge)
This is a book we have all been waiting for. Have you been bombarded with ads for every anti-aging product and diet now that you're a person of a certain age? Instead of anti-aging (which is actually not possible), Deb Benfield brings us Unapologetic Aging. She shares from her decades of clinical experience a hopeful view of our relationship with our aging bodies -- one where, instead of chasing endless unrealistic expectations (fueled by capitalism), we embrace our most authentic selves. What a different world it would be if we honored and cared for our bodies as we age instead of demeaning or restricting them. If you struggle to be unapologetic in your aging (and it's hard not to in this culture), you must read this book. Then, please buy one for all of your friends. We change this ageist culture with ripples of understanding and compassion. Let's change the conversations around growing older and get wiser together. This book is a brilliant invitation to embrace body liberation and joy, at any age.
Heidi Schauster, MS, RD, CEDS-C, SEP
Author of Nourish: How to Heal Your Relationship with Food, Body, and Self and
Nurture: How to Raise Kids Who Love Food, Their Bodies, and Themselves
Unapologetic Aging is an invitation to anyone ready to break free from the false promises of anti-aging culture and reclaim their relationship with their body. With compassion and clarity, Debra Benfield offers practical guidance toward true self-acceptance and a path to aging with confidence. She reminds us that at every stage of life, you are not diminishing—you are becoming more fully yourself.
Tracey Gendron
Professor of Gerontology
Author of Ageism Unmasked: Exploring Age Bias and How to End it.
My new must read recommendation–I no longer fear aging after reading this!
The only thing I learned about aging was to fear it. I heard “wait until you’re my age!” or “be scared of menopause!” Outside of fear and menopause, I have learned nothing from healthcare providers and social media. Do we stop needing any insight on how to live after menopause?
Benfield says in the book “There are just as many ways to have a body as there are to live your life and grow older.” I love this quote because it helps me continue to live my life in my aging body with my non-diet values. I know more now, because of this book, about aging and so glad a book is finally talking about it outside of just menopause!! I especially love the nutrition tools to add in this book as well as the third section on body image.
This book will help me continue to challenge the diet industry. As you read this book, Benfield feels like the mentor we all need to help live an aging life on our own terms without oppressing people including ourselves in the process.
If you are looking for a book that helps you apply non-diet tools like intuitive eating and body liberation to aging–this is your book! Especially if you are trying to navigate eating disorder recovery or helping people recover, this is a must read!
Julie Duffy Dillon, MS, RD, NCC, LDN, CEDS-C
Author of Find Your Food Voice: Defy diet culture, declare body liberation, and reclaim your peace
“If we are lucky, we will have the privilege of going through significant changes throughout our lives. Our thoughts, feelings, values, and, of course, our bodies are in constant flux. I profoundly appreciate Deb Benfield’s empathic and insightful book for the help it will give us to navigate these many changes. Living in a toxic diet, wellness, and ageist culture, we must consistently challenge the messages we are given suggesting that we’re not good enough, especially as we age. To break free from this tyranny, Unapologetic Aging helps us to radically accept what we cannot change while appreciating the rewards that life’s changes bring us. Through Deb’s wisdom as well as poignant stories from her clients, we are guided to increase our self-compassion and confidence, and to become excited about all the avenues that are yet to be explored. Finally, it brings us to the gift of body liberation.”
- Elyse Resch, MS, RDN, CED-S, FAND, Co-creator of Intuitive Eating
Two books for the price of one? Unapologetically Aging is just that. Benfield starts by poignantly describing how the body-shaming messages of today’s anti-aging, weight loss, wellness, fitness, and beauty industries intensify racism, oppression, patriarchy, and diet culture. Relentlessly preying on women and teaching us to look at and loathe our bodies but never to live in and love them, our self-respect is stolen, and our nervous systems dysregulated. Later chapters draw from Benfield’s decades of experience helping people navigate this toxic culture, demonstrating how to create a respectful and embodied partnership with our bodies.
Unapologetically Aging is a must-read for any woman who wants to understand and revise her body story—a gift that women desperately need today. Think of all the women you know who yearn to make peace with their bodies—I have a long list of my own. My recommendation: Get it (for yourself!) and give it (to all those other women, too!). We could change our world, and our bodies would thank us! It’s never too late….
Margo Maine, PhD, FAED, CEDS, is a clinical psychologist and specialist in eating disorders and related issues. A Founder and Fellow of the Academy for Eating Disorders. Dr. Maine is also author of: Pursuing Perfection: Eating Disorders, Body Myths, and Women at Midlife and Beyond; Treatment of Eating Disorders: Bridging the Research- Practice Gap; Effective Clinical Practice in the Treatment of Eating Disorders; The Body Myth; Father Hunger; and Body Wars; and is Senior Editor Emeritus of Eating Disorders: The Journal of Treatment and Prevention.
As a therapist who specializes in eating disorders and body image, I struggle to find books and resources in/for midlife and beyond that align with my values of living and practicing from a non-diet approach. Unapologetically Aging is exactly what I’ve been looking for! It’s the antidote we need to cultivate a peaceful relationship with our bodies at this stage of life. It’s a guide to learn how to care for our bodies as we age free of the narrative we’re sold about our bodies being wrong and needing to be changed."
Signe Darpinian, LMFT, CEDS, author of A Woman's Guide to Menopause, Body Image, and Emotional Well-being at Midlife
my story …
I’m a Registered Dietitian/Nutritionist (RDN) with over 40 years of experience helping people heal their relationship with food, movement, and their bodies. My work sits at the intersection of body liberation and anti-ageism, grounded in the belief that you can care for your body without losing your mind.
With a trauma-informed lens, I support people of all ages and sizes in feeling more comfortable, confident, and at home in their bodies. I believe you are the expert on your body—and if that truth has been buried under years of diet culture or ageist messaging, I’m here to help you reclaim it.
Now in my 60s, I’m embracing the liberating path of elderhood. My curiosity about aging deepened when I turned 60 and realized that, while my energy may be more finite, my life feels more expansive than ever. I wasn’t interested in “fighting aging” or chasing longevity for its own sake—I was seeking vitality, clarity, and the freedom to live in alignment with my values.
But when I looked for guidance, I found that most resources still centered weight loss. Even the emerging pro-aging space often clung to narrow beauty ideals, leaving little room for body diversity or liberation.
“So,I decided to create what I was looking for.”
Drawing from research in age-affirming nutrition, yoga, somatic practices, and trauma-informed mindfulness—plus my decades of professional experience—I’ve created a space for people who want to age unapologetically and live vibrantly in their bodies.
This work has culminated in my book, Unapologetic Aging: How to Mend and Nourish Your Relationship with Your Body. I also offer a membership, small group experiences, and 1:1 coaching.
My mission is to support you in making choices that feel nourishing, sustainable, and liberating—so you can feel vital, alive, and free from the suffocating rules of diet and wellness culture.
This is not the time to shrink.
This is your time to expand into the fullness of your life.
